I know why I'm so torn, and so confused, and it's because I am HURT. I am mad at Alex for ruining my holidays. For making me feel alone on Thanksgiving. For breaking up with me before my birthday, before christmas, before the new year. I am grateful for his contributions to make my birthday enjoyable, but it doesn't get rid of the fact that HE BROKE UP WITH ME DURING THE HOLIDAYS. My favorite days of the year, ruined. I can't cope with this because I'm so mad and so angry. You can't make this up to me. You just can't, and you don't want to. This is the most selfish thing you can do, and it's apparent that you don't care. I don't want to keep this bottled in.
Let me be mad.
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